What If NDG Became a Neighbourhood That Asked, “Who Hasn’t Been Invited Yet?”

 

There is a subtle difference between being welcome and being invited.

A person can be welcome at a community event and never attend.

A neighbour can be welcome to join a conversation and remain standing alone.

A newcomer can be welcome in NDG and still spend months without anyone asking them to come along.

Sometimes people don't need an open door.

They need somebody to walk over, look them in the eye and say:

“Come with us.”

I think those three words could help transform NDG.

Come With Us

Imagine a group of neighbours heading for coffee and noticing someone sitting alone in the lobby.

“We're going for coffee. Come with us.”

A few people are walking around the park.

“We're going for a walk. Come with us.”

Children are playing basketball and another child is watching from the sidelines.

“Want to play with us?”

Several neighbours are sitting outside on a summer evening.

Someone they barely know walks past.

Instead of simply waving:

“Grab a chair!”

These moments seem insignificant.

They aren't.

Because somewhere in NDG today there is probably somebody waiting for an invitation they would never dream of requesting.

A newcomer.

A shy teenager.

A recently divorced parent.

A senior who has lost a spouse.

Someone struggling financially who assumes they can't participate.

Someone whose first language isn't English or French.

Someone who has lived in the same apartment building for twenty years but has never really felt part of it.

And there is another group we should think about too:

the people who are always almost included.

The quiet person at the edge of the gathering.

The employee everyone likes but nobody invites.

The neighbour everyone recognizes but nobody really knows.

The child who watches the other children play.

The person who says, “No, that's okay,” the first time because they aren't certain the invitation is genuine.

A caring community notices the centre.

A great community notices the edges.

So perhaps we could develop a new NDG habit.

Whenever we gather—whether there are two of us or twenty—we ask:

“Who hasn't been invited yet?”

Not because every gathering must include everybody.

It shouldn't.

Friendships and families need their own time.

But occasionally, we can widen the circle by one chair.

One person.

One invitation.

Imagine restaurants filled with tables where somebody new has been included.

Walking groups that continually acquire new walkers.

Apartment residents inviting someone from another floor.

Families occasionally asking a person living alone to Sunday dinner.

Teenagers being encouraged to notice the kid standing by himself.

Seniors inviting newcomers for tea.

Newcomers eventually becoming the people who welcome the next newcomers.

That's how belonging multiplies.

And there is something beautiful about an invitation that requires almost nothing from the person receiving it.

You don't need to be interesting.

You don't need to bring anything.

You don't need to know anybody.

You don't need to earn your place.

Someone simply made room for you.

Today's A NuVo World challenge is therefore wonderfully simple:

Widen one circle by one person.

The next time you're having coffee, walking, sitting in the park, eating lunch or doing something enjoyable, look around.

Is there someone nearby who might appreciate hearing:

“Would you like to join us?”

They may decline.

That's perfectly okay.

Because even an invitation can communicate something deeply human:

I noticed you.

I thought of you.

There was room for you.

And perhaps that is one of the most important things A NuVo World can become.

Not merely a community where everybody is welcome.

But a community where somebody actually comes looking for you.

Let's build an NDG with fewer people standing at the edges.

Move over.

Add a chair.

Open the circle.

And say the words that might change someone's entire day:

“Come with us.”

A NuVo World — creating a NuVo, better world one day, one person and one invitation at a time.